It’s the second session with this woman whose fibromyalgia diagnosis is 6 months old. She’s had fibro for a couple of years. A constant 2 of pain, and a couple of times a month it flares to 8 and holds that number for a solid couple days, driving her to bed, in a darkened room, trying to escape all light and sound.
For an hour we tap on the thing that is bugging her the most – and its not her physical pain – its the huge list of things to do that is oppressing her every moment. “I am so sick of that list,” she exclaims as we tap.
“Nothing to do,” I say as we tap. “Just be aware.”
“Everything I have done, has just been one more thing on the list.”
“The idea of doing anything just adds to the list.”
“I am so weary of this list.”
We check in and in the next round we open up some possibilities.
“Maybe I have to do this list.”
“Maybe this list always has to be my boss.”
“Or maybe it doesn’t.”
“It’s the boss of me know.”
“I’m a slave to this list.”
“It always has another task for me.”
“Maybe it has to be this way.”
“Maybe it doesn’t.”
As we check in I ask if there’s a different feeling about the list. “Yes, I don’t feel it right now.”
What is happening for this person, I am recognizing more and more as a pattern. We feel like we HAVE TO DO OUR EXISTING PATTERN, and yet its EXHAUSTING us WEARING US OUT, and we’re dreading it, but we have no idea of what else to try.
Tapping allows this person to recognize this truth. Then we tap some more, just BEING with this new awareness. Stress goes down. Tension goes down. Soon this person feels like they aren’t a slave to the bad boss list anymore.
The session is coming to a close. I barely remember to ask about her physical pain. She turns her attention to her body, then exclaims.
“I don’t’ have any pain!.” It’s a zero. It’s a one.”
I’m ecstatic for her, but the quick change from a zero to one is interesting. I ask her why she changed the zero level to a one.
She thinks and waits for an answer before speaking.
“I’m afraid. I’m afraid that if I have no pain, then the pain will come back. I’m afraid of that happening.”
We sit back down and tap again, just being aware of the fear, acknowledging it, nothing to do but be aware. The fear softens and disappears.
Out in the lobby of the office, I see this person kneeling down to tie her shoe – strange behavior for a person with fibromyalgia – usually they wear slipper to minimize the pain of putting on shoes.
“Do you normally kneel down to put yourshoes on?”
“Oh, my god.” She answers.
“I never kneel down! I haven’t put my knees on the ground for years. I didn’t even notice.”
How can a person forget their caution about their body so instantly, so completely? With EFT this is a pretty common phenomenon, once the intense issue is released, its just not a big deal anymore. Brainwise, this make sense if the memory that has been so impactful gets stored in a new way. Then it really isn’t the same old memory. It’s something new, including kneeling on the ground without fear of pain, just five minutes after getting pain free from fibromyalgia.
I’m liking this EFT! I’ll check in about this pain in another week or so. If pain has returned, its now in a completely different category – it has disappeared, while we were paying attention to it. It’s no longer a bad boss, a loose cannon feature in her life over which she has no input. By simple awareness, her pain disappeared – and if needed – we can do that EFT process of awareness over and over again, until that pain stays aways. It’s now a new world – you can’t unknow this once you know it.