Calm
In focusing on finite things, as we mostly do,
we become a reaction to those finite things.
When we focus on the space between
we become aware of nothing (no-thing.)
In your awareness of this space with nothing in it,
you become a reaction to this no-thing.
You are in this moment, now,
both non-reactive, and also non-attached.
This calm is not a manufactured calm,
not some mask you create
for hiding underlying upsets.
This calm is not a reaction to what charges you.
This calm is what arises
as a result of your awareness
of the space with nothing in it.
You become aware of what has always been there.
(Page 23)
Calm is the simplest thing you will ever do.
It is nothing. Calm can also feel hard
until it feels easy — as long as this space of nothing
stays hidden by our attractions and reactions.
(Page 109)
Source
Tell me if it gets any better than this;
if you could wish for any greater awareness:
to be aware of Source and experience
non-reactivity and non-attachment?
I invite you
to live your life
from this
awareness of Source.
To do this,
to live from this awareness of Source,
we need to remove whatever distracts our attention
from resting here in Source.
Thankfully, we can use this river of life,
combined with Memory Reconsolidation,
to remove emotional charges and attachments
from our most basic life patterns.
When we remove these charges,
we have fewer reactivities
taking our attention
away from Source.
(Page 65-67)
Enlightenment
Enlightenment is not about
becoming something different.
Enlightenment is about removing the barriers
to awareness of what we already are.
(Page 68)
Stress Response
A benefit of paying attention to nothing:
your stress response turns off.
You can see this in the phrase itself.
Your stress response is a “response.”
If you stop responding to anything,
and start responding to nothing,
there will be nothing
for your stress to respond to.
Your stress response turns off,
because nothing remains to keep it turned “on.”
This is logical and true.
The space between has much to offer.
(Page 25)
Reactivity Patterns
A benefit of paying attention to nothing:
your stress response turns off.
You can see this in the phrase itself.
Your stress response is a “response.”
If you stop responding to anything,
and start responding to nothing,
there will be nothing
for your stress to respond to.
Your stress response turns off,
because nothing remains to keep it turned “on.”
This is logical and true.
The space between has much to offer.
(Page 92)
Memory Reconsolidation
Okay — Memory Reconsolidation — what is it?
It turns out whenever you make a memory
chemical changes happen to store the memory.
Scientists believed these memories stored permanently.
Memory Reconsolidation discovered,
when you recall a memory,
you can eliminate the emotional charge
before the memory settles back in place.
(page 37)
Astounding,
but this
is the mechanism
of Memory Reconsolidation.
At the end of this process,
a memory that once held
an emotion of anger, fear, or sadness,
now reconsolidates with calm instead of upset.
If you know and use this tool,
you will have tremendous
possibilities for transforming
upsets to calm.
Knowing the process
of Memory Reconsolidation
provides a clarity and simplicity
of understanding and practice.
(Page 46)
The ICE Method
ICE is a simple technique
for removing attachments
and reactivities.
Permanently.
The two-point exercise gives us
a momentary experience of non-attachment
during the time while our attention
rests in the space between — while we react to nothing.
When we pay attention to nothing,
our stress response turns off.
The parasympathetic nervous system signals calm,
instead of anger, fear, or sadness, from the amygdala.
Memory Reconsolidation
lets us activate
our attachments
and then become non-reactive.
This three-step process
is a template
for addressing any issues
that arise in your life.
Step One of ICE — IDENTIFY
In this first step, let yourself be aware of an issue.
Identify the memory. Identify where you feel it in your body.
Identify the emotion: anger, fear, sadness, or another.
Step Two of ICE — CALM
Use the two-point exercise that opens this book.
Bring your attention away from the issue,
and to the space of calm where stress turns off.
Step Three of ICE — EXCHANGE
Revisit the original upset emotion you identified.
Revisit the place in your body where you felt the memory.
These three steps exchange upsets with calm.
(Page 40-41)
Meditation
Sometimes meditators
report amazing results of the upset vanishing;
of a roadblock on life’s journey
being removed completely.
Other times, meditators report
being stuck at a roadblock
for days, or months, or years,
without that upset ever budging.
Wouldn’t it be nice
if we had a better understanding
of what happens in meditation
when we have a breakthrough (or when we don’t)?
Memory Reconsolidation
gives people who meditate
both a perspective for understanding experiences
and a tool for achieving predictable results.
Most meditation practices
could become
much more predictable
by doing just two things.
Before a meditation session:
Identify upsets and activate memories.
After meditation:
Exchange your emotional state.
When a person reports the removal
of an upset during meditation, I believe
it’s because the two steps of Identification and Exchange
somehow happened along with their meditation.
When a person stays stuck in a roadblock,
even with consistent meditation,
it’s because either Identification or Exchange
did not take place during the meditation.
If the three steps of reconsolidation
resulted in the meditation breakthrough,
then why not make these three steps
a conscious part of every meditation?
A simple modification would deliver results.
Before meditation, Identify any upsets.
Then proceed with a regular meditation practice.
After meditation, revisit the upsets and Exchange.
(Page 48-50)
Anxiety, Panic, PTSD
If you have highly charged upsets
like PTSD or anxiety attacks,
your fight/flight/freeze goes on high alert
and you go into survival mode.
In survival mode,
your reactivity captures your awareness,
and for as long as it lasts,
you lose control of your attention.
We need to find a way
to bring you back to calm,
and then to play on this river
in such a gentle way you won’t trigger.
The good news is that PTSD memories
form and store the same as any other memory,
which means that, with Memory Reconsolidation,
they can be removed completely.
If you’re highly charged, you want to remember this:
This method can work as well for you as for anyone,
except it may feel difficult to return to calm
(Page 76-77)